With Conviction

please, no more questions
the star is feeling fatigued
that's all for today
let me go back to my room
to undress and bring my knees
to my chest and my hands
to my mouth as the tears
fall down and down and out

reality just isn't cutting it
every time I miss pills
it comes creeping back in
there are stronger people than I
so what am I doing,
giving up my mind?

back to the wardrobe
to get out the winter clothes
in the middle of July
maybe if I put on some kind of barrier
I can block the sounds out
I can block the lights out

please, no more questions
I can only say with conviction
that I can't keep going
let me out of the house
too repressed and too fucked
too held down and too stuck
to the walls of my mind
as I try to get down and get out

please, no more questions
I say this with conviction
I can't rein myself in any more
let me out of my body
to climb up and bring my spirit
to my mouth just to swallow
to return to the air as the judgements
rain down and down and disappear.

© Jess Zelhart, 2006. Thou shalt not steal.

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